scared and mad

I'm scared today. Ari is leaving at 7:35 am and I'll probably never see her again. Some of my friends have been getting warned about being banned...but I don't see what's wrong. All of those people have saved my life. All those *hugs* that they send me have kept me going, but now it turns out *hugs* are sexual content. I have no idea about you guys, but for me sexual content is way worse than hugging and kissing. If my friends get banned from Haiku I will only have one week of life left. I know this because a lot of times I have been about to do it when I don't talk with certain people for a week. All of my friends are roleplayers and most of them follow the rules, so I don't see why they can't *hug* or *kiss* others. Some people that have been reported a lot of times, and come every single day to mess with us, don't get banned! But the people I care about and keep me living get banned for dumb resons! If it wasn't because I can't talk with them out of Haiku I would have left years ago! But I won't......I can't......I really don't want to die....but without them.....I know I'l lose it.....please read this and understand